Transcript for
Parenting while living with mental illness

Narrator (00:02): 

Welcome to the Emerging Minds Families Podcast. 

Nadia (Host) (00:05): 

Hi, I’m Nadia Rossi, and welcome to an Emerging Minds Families Podcast. Before we start today’s episode, we would like to pay our respects to the traditional custodians of the land on which this podcast is recorded, the Kaurna people of the Adelaide Plains. We also pay respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples, their ancestors, and Elders past, present, and emerging from the different First Nations across Australia. 

(00:34): 

Today we welcome back Nicki, a mum of two, for a conversation about parenting while living with mental illness. Nicki shares with us her experience of navigating parenting through times of wellness and times of struggle and reflects on what has helped her along the way, from support networks and self-compassion to talking openly with her children about mental health in age-appropriate ways. So let’s jump into this conversation with Nicki. 

(01:01): 

Welcome back, Nicki. It is great to speak with you again, and thank you for taking the time to talk with us today about parental mental illness. I know parenting can be a wonderful experience. As a mother of two, I know firsthand the challenges that parenting can bring. For parents who experience mental illness, what are some of the added challenges? 

Nicki Walsh (Guest) (01:20): 

Look, I think there’s plenty, and it probably depends on how your mental illness impacts you. I think primarily if you are unable to look after yourself and your own wellbeing, it leaves very little in the tank to look after anybody else. From my experience, when I’m not doing well, I have much lower patience. I have a much lower threshold sensory of what I can manage in my surroundings. I’m more likely to yell and snap and parent in a way that I wouldn’t normally parent, because literally I’m so depleted in terms of energy and emotional coping skills, that I’m doing everything I can to get up and out of bed and get people dressed and whatnot, that there’s nothing left for all of that warm, positive parenting stuff. There’s nothing left for connection. There’s nothing left for positively managing conflict. There’s just nothing there, which means you tend to respond in a really not so great way, probably. 

Nadia (Host) (02:16): 

When you’re experiencing those more difficult times, like those moments of depletion, are there things that have really helped you parent the way you want to in those difficult times? 

Nicki Walsh (Guest) (02:26): 

This depends on how unwell you are as well. Because if you’re struggling a little bit and you’re a little bit depleted, sometimes things that can help me include maybe having a nap and getting someone else to watch the kids or taking the kids around to my mum and dad’s house and letting them manage the childcare responsibilities. 

(02:47): 

I experience pretty severe perinatal mental illness, obsessive compulsive disorder, and agoraphobia, and I also have bipolar disorder, and so my mental health challenges can be very severe. That’s when I require a little bit more than the usual go out and sit in the sunshine, count to 10, and do some deep breathing. They’re great strategies to someone who is on the mild end of the spectrum or who just might need a reset. But for someone who’s really unwell, if I’m really struggling with depression or mania, sometimes my family honestly has to step in and make those decisions for me because it can be really difficult when you’re unwell to recognise that you’re unwell. It can be really difficult as well to have the capacity to be able to go, “I’m unwell, and this is what is going to work for me.” 

(03:35): 

So I think, for me, it’s just like a mild thing, I can put in place all of those: reading a book, having a nap, getting someone else to look after the kids, having some me time. If it is actually my chronic and severe mental illness, quite often my family, they’re aware of what my red flags are, and I will communicate with them how I’m feeling. Then typically, I will need them to step in and say, “Okay, you stay in bed, and I’m going to go and take the kids here or I’m going to go do this.” 

(04:03): 

I think it’s a spectrum. There are some things that work for mild, and if you’re moderately unwell, maybe you need to have a friend over to support or have some time away, and if you’re really quite unwell, quite often you do need that more intensive professional support or for your family to step in and really manage your situation for you. 

Nadia (Host) (04:26): 

Talking about supports, how important have they been in your management and your journey? 

Nicki Walsh (Guest) (04:31): 

Yeah, no, definitely. I think at different points I’ve needed different levels of support. So over time, that has included obviously family, friends, partner. It has also included mental health professionals, psychologists, OT, psychiatrists. It has included mental health inpatient unit stays. It has included peer groups, so other groups of people that are experiencing the same mental health challenges as I am. It has included helplines and online support. So when I’m really unwell is to the extent of childcare support, to get my children extra time in childcare, some support with work and study, so making sure that that is managed while I can’t physically commit to it. 

(05:18): 

So I think there’s a lot of supports out there that you can step up or step down into depending on how well or unwell you are. Hardly anyone requires the highest level of support all the time. So it’s fine to access that highest level of inpatient stays and childcare supports and financial supports, but then for that to be for a month or two, and then you might go home and you might be relying on peer supports and seeing your psychologist. So I think I’ve had tonnes of support, and I draw on them as I need. I really rely on my support network to advise me of other supports, and I rely on my network to advise me of when they think I might need to access additional supports as well. 

Nadia (Host) (06:00): 

You paint a really great picture of what supports are out there and at what certain times you may need those supports and to know that they’re not always family and they’re not always friends, but sometimes just getting extra childcare so you have that afternoon to yourself. There’s a helpline out there, so if you don’t have family and friends to talk to, there’s someone, or if you just want someone that’s completely unbiased to speak to, that those supports are out there. 

(06:25): 

I wanted to talk about children and talking with children about your experience with your mental health. Is there an age you feel is right to have those conversations, or do you feel like, have those conversations been ongoing with your children since they were little, or did you pick a, “Okay, we’re going to talk about this when they’re 12”? 

Nicki Walsh (Guest) (06:44): 

For me, I think that from right from when they’re babies, before they can even talk back to you, you can speak to them and say, “Mummy’s really sad today, and that’s why my face is like this.” I didn’t do that. I didn’t have the knowledge that I have now about babies and mental health, but I wish that I had. But I do believe that there’s no, in my view, young age. 

(07:07): 

Mental health is a spectrum. As we know, you can either have really good mental health, really bad mental health, or most people are in between. So why wouldn’t we talk about that with kids when we’re talking about feelings and emotions? We do that from when they’re one, two, three. Mental health spectrum is actually just as normal and biological as that. 

(07:26): 

I would say there’s lots of great books out there if you’re not sure of what to say, lots of picture books that explain that mental health is not a bad thing. Actually having good mental health is amazing, but sometimes we have bad mental health, and most of the time we’re in the middle. So I think there are conversations that, if I ever had a baby now, which I will not be having, but just if I was to have a baby now, it would be something that would be part of our family conversations from when they were born. 

(07:53): 

Now, with my children, it was very young anyway because my daughter kind of developed anxiety when she was about two and a half, three, and saw her first child psychologist when she was three. So from that point, we’re kind of talking about her mental health, and it just made sense for me to say, “I kind of get where you’re coming from. You’re three, I’m 22, but I get it because I also have anxiety.” So I think it was an easy conversation for us in a way that my daughter experienced mental health challenges quite young that meant we were open about it. Then when her brother came along, she was still in treatment. So he grew up going to mental health appointments for me and for his sister. 

(08:32): 

I was very lucky in that I grew up in a family where my mum was very, very honest and upfront around our family’s generational mental health challenges with bipolar disorder and all of those types of things. So I feel like I’ve got a bit of a head start to some people, and I feel like my kids maybe have a little bit of a head start in that it was just the most normal thing for us to talk about because it was part of all of our daily lives. 

(08:56): 

My daughter was three when I was hospitalised. We had to explain that to her. It wasn’t difficult because I didn’t feel any shame or stigma over it. But I have obviously worked and have friends and stuff that, because of the way they were raised, they do hold a lot of shame around their mental health, and they do find it much more difficult to talk to their children about. I think in that situation it’s just keep trying. I really do believe that watching Bluey episodes or reading picture books means that you don’t have to maybe have the conversation, but it’s giving you the language and the tools to use with a young child. 

Nadia (Host) (09:33): 

And it’s finding those age appropriate ins. A picture book, a kid will always, most of the time sit down if you’re going to read them a story. So it’s giving them that time to hear the story and process it in their own way, and then it gives them language and more understanding and that openness that you talk about in your family. I wanted to talk a bit about language. How did you find talking to your kids and children about your good days and your bad days, and has that language changed over time? 

Nicki Walsh (Guest) (10:05): 

Yeah, look, I think definitely it’s changed depending on their developmental age and stage. When they were younger, it would’ve been like, “Mummy’s sad today, and I’m just going to stay in bed because I’m a bit sad.” The problem with bipolar is when I was manic or hypermanic, I didn’t necessarily agree with the people around me that I was. I think like we used to say something like, “Oh, mummy’s having a full-on day today,” or whatnot. As they got older, that transitioned into using the actual terminology. I guess it’s similar to the conversations that we have around using body parts, the correct terminology for body parts. I’ve always been a big believer in that. 

(10:44): 

So as they got old enough, I began transitioning to using, “Mummy or Mum has, I have a condition that’s called bipolar disorder. That means that some days I’m really, really depressed, or some weeks I’m really, really depressed and that means really, really sad. Then other times I’m really happy, but I make lots of decisions that I probably wouldn’t make otherwise,” and so explaining it to them. Then obviously after a period of time of explaining those things to them, all I had to say was, “I’m having a depressive day,” and they would be like, “Yep, okay, got you.” So I think definitely the language transitioned depending on how old they were, but it kind of transitioned at the same age, both of them. So Riley probably learned the technical stuff a bit earlier than Emily. 

(11:24): 

Part of the bipolar disorder was a substance use disorder in terms of alcohol. That was probably the most difficult part to describe because they really understood because they were witnessing my behaviour when I had been drinking alcohol, but then they were witnessing other family members who could drink alcohol and not have the same impact. So they had a lot of questions about that. 

(11:43): 

Most of those questions actually, they talked to my husband because that was an area I was ashamed of and I found it really difficult to talk about. So my husband was like this safe mediator place where he’s like, “Well, some people can drink alcohol and be okay. Other people, like your mum, have something with their brain that kind of makes it go zero to a hundred.” So, yeah, I think there was lots of conversations about that. Then as they grew older, there was lots of conversations about sobriety and why I wasn’t sober and then why I did end up getting sober. So it has really evolved over time, but with a lot of conversation and a lot of me having to leave my ego and shame at the door and just be like, “This is their experience of me as a mum, and I just have to accept that that’s their experience of me as a mum.” 

Nadia (Host) (12:32): 

Nicki, so when you started having conversations around your mental health with your children, did you find that they responded or understood in a similar way, or did they have different responses, and has their understanding shifted over time? 

Nicki Walsh (Guest) (12:48): 

Yeah, great question. I think definitely. There are three and a half, four years between my two children, and so my understanding grew about it as well. I guess initially when I began having conversations, it was different to both of them because they were so developmentally far apart. My eldest understood a lot more than what my youngest did. 

(13:11): 

I think as they grew, their understanding caught up to each other over time, and we began having even more in-depth conversations and giving more details and more examples to them. Whereas when they were really little, it was reading storybooks about parents that might have a mental illness and then saying, “Oh, that’s like Mummy. Mummy does that sometimes too, doesn’t she?” whereas then they got older and they started asking the harder questions, I think, to answer sometimes. They were things like, “How come some people get better and some people don’t get better? How come my friend’s mum, who has anxiety, is like this and you’re like this?” 

(13:49): 

So I think you’re constantly being very flexible with how you discuss with your kids. Because not only do they understand it in different ways if you’ve got multiple kids, they’re also different temperaments. My son is far more of a nurturing temperament where he will just come up and cuddle and go, “You’ll be okay, Mum. It’s okay.” Whereas my eldest is far more critically thinking. She’ll want to ask the difficult questions, “How long is this one going to last? Have you taken medication for this? What did your doctor say?” So I think it is a struggle. Because in that moment, I think as a parent and you’re not doing well, it’s really hard to come up with answers that are age appropriate and also that will satisfy their knowledge or their want for knowledge. So I think it is really important to start having the conversations if you can when you’re well or during a period of time when you’re doing well because it’s much easier to answer those difficult questions when you’re well than when you’re right in the thick of it. 

(14:51): 

I think it’s okay to also say to your kids, and I say to my kids all the time, “I don’t know how to answer that question right now. Can I write it down, and can we have a talk about it after I’ve had a bit of a think?” because they can throw some really curly ones at you about past experiences and things they’ve witnessed. It can be emotional. It can be hard for you to relive that. Also, you want to make sure that you’re giving them the most positive, hope-filled response you can. So I think it’s totally okay to just say, “Hmm, that’s a great question. I don’t know the answer to that right now, but how about we have a chat tomorrow?” Or sometimes your partner or family members can also play a role in this. My husband can sometimes answer things better than I can in terms of their curly questions and understandings of my mental illness. 

Nadia (Host) (15:37): 

I think that’s wonderful letting parents know that it is okay to not know in that moment and also letting your children know that, “I’m not going to be able to answer everything at once or in the moment.” So when they maybe have a tough time, they’ll also maybe give themselves that grace and that time to go, “I don’t need to know everything now. I can have time to come back and give a response to whatever it may be,” but also giving them that space and that understanding, too, “This is a tough spot at the moment. We can revisit this when Mum’s feeling better.” I think that’s a great takeaway for listeners is to have those conversations or prepare your children in those moments when you are feeling your best and how that conversation can then help lay those foundations for when you are having a tough time. 

(16:22): 

Nicki, do you find it important that your children see you do things to support your mental health and wellbeing and take care of yourself? Do you feel like purposefully modelling taking care of yourself supports your children to understand how important it is to look after yourself? 

Nicki Walsh (Guest) (16:39): 

Yeah, look, absolutely. I think, probably, that’s a universal thing. I think it’s important for everyone. Whether the parents are experiencing mental illness or not, I think it’s important for our kids to see us role modelling the things we want for them: healthy eating, good relationships, decent rest, going to the doctor when we need to. All of those types of things, I think, is important for everyone. 

(17:00): 

I think it’s critically important for families where the parents might be struggling with or have challenges with mental ill health or maybe substance use challenges as well because they’re seeing a much more complex rollercoaster of emotions as opposed to what the average person would see day to day, which is like, “Sometimes Mum’s a bit sad, sometimes she’s a bit angry. Most of the time she’s right in the middle.” 

(17:25): 

Kids that have parents that have a serious or chronic mental illness, they’re seeing the extremes of the emotions and the outcomes of those mental illnesses. So it’s really important, I think, for those children to see that their parents in some way have control over those conditions. They may not be able to control having the condition in the first place, but they can certainly control trying to stay well and trying to enjoy life and trying to be as healthy as they can for their children, and hopefully, their children will absorb all of those things that they’re growing up with. Whether that’d be Sunday afternoon walks in the local wetlands or whether that’d be cooking together healthy meals a couple of nights a week, they’re the good, healthy things that the children will remember as they grow up, because obviously I want to be really open and honest. 

(18:13): 

For parents like me, it can be really hard to do those things all the time. I certainly have gone through periods of my life, months and months and months at a time, where things like cooking healthy meals and going for a walk out in the sun and sharing jokes around the dinner table just was not something that I was able to achieve. So it’s balance. When I am able to do those things, we do them. They might not always prevent a dip or something bad or a relapse from happening because that’s not the way that mental illness works, and children will grow to understand that. But this is what we’re doing when things are looking well, and this is what we’re doing to try and stay well as long as possible, but very much acknowledging that … 

(18:53): 

I don’t want any parents that are struggling listening to this right now to go, “Oh my God, I’m so sick of being told to go outside and to play with my kids and to cook healthy meals,” because I 100% know that that is just one step too far for a lot of people who are actively struggling with their mental health at the moment. It’s okay. You don’t have to do those things all the time. But when you can do them, do them. Because, number one, they’re fun, and number two, we know that they’re good for mental health, and number three, that’s one thing that our kids can remember that these are our routines when we’re well. When we’re unwell, it might look a bit different, but when we’re well, this is what it looks like. 

Nadia (Host) (19:30): 

I think that’s such an important thing to note is that, yes, of course, you want to be able to take care of yourself but when you can, and acknowledging in those tough times there are going to be times where you’re not going to be able to. But you paint such a realistic picture of expectations and managing those expectations. Then, also, I guess when you can and in those good times or when you’re able to model to your children, then that can benefit their own wellbeing because they then see you and what you’re doing and they can take that on and go, “Okay, well maybe I will if I can go for a walk.” 

Nicki Walsh (Guest) (20:01): 

Yeah. I think the other thing that I had forgotten to add is that you can role model taking care of yourself when you’re really not doing well. It just looks a lot different to what the media and the tip sheets that are all about prevention talk about. Role modelling being well and looking after yourself when you are having an episode or you have relapsed it and you’re really struggling, it can be things like your kids seeing you be kind to yourself. It can be as simple as your kids seeing you be honest with them about what you can and can’t achieve and say, “Look, I would love to be able to go and play Barbies with you right now, but Mummy really needs to lay down. Can we lay down and watch Barbie on the TV instead?” Or role modelling going to doctor’s appointments, role modelling taking the medications that you need to take, role modelling trying to sleep at normal times. 

(20:53): 

I think that in and of itself, I try to think of it as an extra superpower for my kids because a lot of kids don’t get to see their parents really, really struggling. Parents are always the powerful, strong ones that hold together a family. But my kids have been able to see me in times where I’ve been a shell of who I usually am, but they’ve seen me do these little things, get up, have a drink of water, go and lay on the couch with them instead of lay in my bed, have a shower every two days instead of every day. Those little things that to the average human out there would be like, “That’s not really awesome,” but for us, it’s like that’s us really trying to take care of ourselves during really tough periods of time. I think my kids have grown up going, “Wow, that’s strength.” It takes a lot of strength sometimes to wash your hair when you can’t even get out of bed. 

(21:41): 

Now that my kids are older and teenagers, I can see that they’re starting to recognise that watching me look after myself, watching me prevent becoming unwell and doing all the right things and eat healthy and exercise and all the rest of it is fine. It’s good. Everyone should see their parents do that. But watching me physically drag myself out of bed to kiss them goodnight or to go and have a drink of milk from the fridge because I hadn’t had anything all day, that is the stuff that also role models to kids that you’re trying and you’re trying to get better. 

Nadia (Host) (22:13): 

Thank you for sharing that and really painting a picture of what the different ways of looking after yourself are and, like you said, not always the way that the media or that we’re told to look after ourselves. It’s just a spectrum of what you can do in that moment. Nicki, I was wondering, what would you say to a parent experiencing mental illness about being self-compassionate? 

Nicki Walsh (Guest) (22:35): 

Yeah, look, I would immediately jump right in and say probably what everybody else would say, which is, “You are doing great. Look after yourself. Lots of people go through this struggle. You’re not alone.” But then in the back of my head, I’m also knowing that the times where people have said that to me, I haven’t always taken it on board because in some ways you can’t force someone to be self-compassionate, if that makes sense. You can try to support them and tell them that they’re doing a great job and all of those types of things. But if deep down they’re really, really in a not so good place and they’re really, really struggling, it’s going to take a lot more than probably my words to change how they’re feeling. 

(23:17): 

I think then it jumps into, how can I use my words and turn them into actions and hopefully try to make a bit of a difference in this person’s life? If it’s a close friend, it can be committing to just coming and hanging at their house for a bit or doing some cleaning for them. They don’t even have to talk to you if they don’t want to, but you’re just there. 

(23:38): 

Sharing my story has been a really important part of connecting with other parents that are experiencing mental illness. Because I think once you have heard someone’s story, their raw story, it’s the power of peer work, really. You develop a connection with that person and you go, “Actually, this person in front of me has just told me all of these things about how terrible their experience has been. But I’m looking at them, and I think they’re doing quite a great job. I think that they’re smashing it.” That can go a long way to go, “Maybe I can be that person who’s smashing it one day. Maybe not today. Maybe I’m very early in my journey, and I’ve got a little way to go. But maybe in five years’ time I’m going to look back on this and be able to say, ‘No, you did a good job, Mum. You did a fantastic job.'” 

(24:23): 

I think overall women are really critical on themselves and their parenting skills and abilities just in general. I don’t think there is many of us who jump headfirst into this journey, mental illness or not, that have a lot of self-compassion. We’re always comparing ourselves to other people. We’re always going, “Oh, Becky’s child is eating 500 types of fruits and vegetables and sleeping 12 hours a night. I must be doing something wrong because I’m not enjoying this.” I think the more that we talk openly about our honest experiences, the more that we will realise that parenting is just really, really difficult regardless of what you’re experiencing. With that normalisation, I think will come self-acceptance, self-empathy, self-compassion. 

(25:11): 

But at the moment, to go back to what we said previously about the media, you look at any media ad about new parents and newborns, and I always say this, you’ve got two parents wearing all white. They’re on a beach for some reason. They’re running down. They’ve got a baby who’s smiling, also wearing white, and everyone’s clean. Those of us who’ve been through the trenches look at that and go, “That cannot be real for many people.” But new parents who’ve never experienced it look at that and go, “Oh, that’s what it must be like.” 

(25:38): 

So I think it’s very hard to have self-compassion for yourself in a world where the media has such high and significant standards placed particularly on mothers and on women and what we should be doing and what we shouldn’t be doing and how we should be doing it. I think we will only get through that by not hiding our struggles that we’re having, but talking openly with our friends and our family and the people who were around about, “Well, no, actually, I really struggled that first 12 weeks, or I really had a tough time, or I couldn’t wait until my child started daycare.” Those are normal conversations that we need to be having so that we realise that we’re all just imperfect and trying to do our best. 

Nadia (Host) (26:19): 

Absolutely. That’s why these conversations with yourself and you being so open and talking about your experience is so valuable and lifts the curtain on what we are presented with, like you said, people that have been through parenting at whatever level, we all know the realities of it and what we go through. I wanted to ask about your experience and from your experience what you would want people to know about parenting when you experience mental illness. 

Nicki Walsh (Guest) (26:47): 

I feel blessed almost, and that sounds … I’ve had a lot of difficulties, and my children have experienced a lot of trauma due to my condition when I couldn’t make decisions that were helpful for myself or for them. They have been through a lot. Some people would look at that and go, “Do you regret it, or what would you have done differently?” Actually, I really struggle with that concept in terms of if I was handed a magic wand, what would I change about my journey as a parent that has a severe mental illness? I was thinking about it last night, actually. It’s really hard for me to say that I would change anything. In fact, most of the time I would say I wouldn’t change a thing. 

(27:27): 

Nobody wants to have a severe mental illness that impacts their life. I’m sure my mum didn’t want to have a baby that would grow up to have this. I’m sure my husband doesn’t want to have a wife that struggles like this, and I’m sure my kids also don’t like to see me struggle. But I think without it, I would be a completely different person, and I would be in a completely different situation. My children would be completely different children. So I would do it all over again really because it’s been hard. It’s really been hard. I’m not going to say that parenting on its own is easy, or parenting with a mental illness or a disability or substance use challenge even, it’s so difficult. But what you get out of the difficulty at the end for me with being someone who has done the years and years and years of hospitals and medications and therapies. 

(28:18): 

My mental illness will never go away. I will live with it for the rest of my life. But I’m at a point where I have a solid understanding of it and how I can manage it and what to do and what to do if it flares up again. But I also look back and go, “Wow, I am a very strong, very knowledgeable, very empathetic person because of the journey that I’ve been through.” I can support parents around me going through the same thing in a way that I could never have supported them if I hadn’t experienced this. 

(28:47): 

My children, sure, I won’t make light of the fact that they have some ongoing challenges and struggles in their own mental health challenges related to their experiences growing up with me being unwell. However, they also have this resilience and strength and kindness and compassion to them. You just see that they understand people deeper than what their behaviours are saying on the background. 

(29:09): 

My daughter’s now an assistant nurse. She works in the dementia ward of an aged care facility. You can see that come out in her now where she’s … these people are wonderful people who’ve lived amazing lives, and their behaviours or their illnesses are not who they are. I think that that’s a big job to do when you’re an 18-year-old girl, and she’s been doing it since she was 15. I think she probably wouldn’t be doing that job if she hadn’t had the experiences that she’d had. 

(29:37): 

So I’m not going to say it’s wonderful, and I’m not going to say that I’ve done everything great. But I am going to say that there are actually a lot of benefits and positives that can come out of these experiences at the end. It can bring your family closer. It can open your eyes to what’s really important to you. I can pick a job and work towards a job that’s really important to me because I know that it could all be taken away in an instant. A lot of people don’t have that clarity or that moment of truth where they go, “Oh, I’m going to do what’s important.” 

(30:03): 

I think as parents with mental illnesses, we have been through it. Our kids have been through it. Our partners and our families have been through it. From all of the rubble and dust and stuff from all the bridges we’ve burned and buildings that have collapsed, we come out of that with a strength and a resilience and empathy for other people, and so do our children, and so do our families. I think I would never take that back in a million years. I would always live the same life with all of the hardships I’ve had just to end up where I am now. 

Nadia (Host) (30:32): 

Thank you, Nicki. There is such strength and resilience to your story. I really want to thank you for being so open and vulnerable in sharing your experience. I can only imagine the impact your story will have on those listening to this podcast episode that are parenting with a mental illness. So thank you so much for sharing with us today. I wanted to just leave on one question, which would be, if you could leave our listeners with one thing to remember from our chat today, what would that be? 

Nicki Walsh (Guest) (31:04): 

I think it would be no matter if you feel like it or you don’t feel like it, you are doing the absolute best that you can for your children every single day, and that doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s best. So every day, just wake up, do the best that you can, and your children will know that you’re doing the best that you can because they’ll see you trying. Then it’s one foot in front of the other, and then things will get better. Then they might get worse, but then they’ll get better again. Then you kind of get used to riding the rollercoaster, I think. Yeah, just enjoy what you can and don’t put high expectations on yourself. Your kids just need you alive. They’re laying in a bed to cuddle. That’s all they need. 

Nadia (Host) (31:42): 

That is a wonderful message to leave on. Thank you so much for joining us today, Nicki. We really appreciate having you. Thank you. 

Nicki Walsh (Guest) (31:48): 

Thanks. 

Nadia (Host) (31:49): 

Thank you for joining us for today’s episode. If you would like to keep up to date with our latest conversations, we’d love it if you liked and subscribed to our Emerging Minds Families Podcast channel. You can also find us on Instagram @emergingmindsau or on Facebook at Emerging Minds Families. 

Narrator (32:07): 

Visit our website at www.emergingminds.com.au/families for a wide range of free information and resources to help support child and family mental health. Emerging Minds leads the National Workforce Centre for Child Mental Health. The centre is funded by the Australian Government Department of Health under the National Support for Child and Youth Mental Health Program.